The important news:
I finally learned how to read the news and still have time for a good life. Here’s how:
1. Any headline that uses words such as “may,” “might,” “could,” get no attention whatever.
2. Mass murders, fires, drownings, cops and robbers, and the like? Forget it.
3. New health studies suggesting coffee is good, not good, effeminate, or an underachiever is yesterday’s fish wrap.
4. And finally, any story on NY real estate prices, or Iran’s nuclear capability, or Putin’s waist measurements are out.
What’s left? The Red Sox. (Heh)